My daddy died when I was 10. Momma remarried David when I was 11. Years later, after I had gotten out of college and married, we were talking and momma told me what happened when she wanted to go to work, while she was married to my dad. He didn’t want her to work.
I remember some of this but, didn’t know what all went on. She said, “I really wanted to work because, we could use the money.” “Your dad was so jealous and he didn’t like men looking at me.” “He always thought a man was wanting to fuck me, even his cousin, Julian.” “He got into more than one fight with Julian when they were drinking because, Julian would look at me or give me a compliment.”
She said, “Your dad would say, you like Julian looking at you don’t you, you really want to fuck him don’t you?” “It didn’t matter what I said, or how much I denied it, I knew he was gonna rip my clothes off and fuck me hard.” “That’s just what he did.”
I said, “Good grief momma, how could you stand that?” She said, “I loved your dad, always.” “As long as he didn’t beat me I would take him fucking me the way he did.” “Actually, I even got to where I would cum when he was in the throws of his passionate anger.”
I told her, “I do remember a few times of hearing you telling daddy he was hurting you, when you were in your bedroom.” “I also remember hearing daddy say, “You want a big dick, I’m giving you one.” “I wasn’t sure what that meant exactly but, I do remember him saying it.”
Momma said, “I’m sorry you heard that.” “He hurt me because, when he would ram me real hard it hurt.” “He had a big dick.” “I don’t know why he thought I wanted a bigger one.” I said, “Did you and Julian ever do anything?” She said, “I did let him fuck me once before your dad an I got married.” “I told your dad and he never got over it.”
“But, your dad looked at every man like they were fucking me.” “I finally started working two nights in the evening as a cashier at Woolworths.” “Your dad dropped me off and picked me up.” “It was only 4 hours, 6:00-10:00.” “I loved it, getting out of the house and talking to other people.”
“Well, that lasted about 3 months an I had to quit.” I said, “Why, did you have to quit?” “Because one night after work I was walking out and my manager, Mark walked out with me.” “When I got in the car your dad immediately said, “Who’s that son of a bitch?” “I told him he was my manager and he said, “Un huh.”
“I knew right then what was gonna happen when we got home.”
“Did it?” “Oh yeah, we put you in bed and he shut our bedroom door and tore my dress off of me.” “He ripped off my panties and bra.” “He took his knife and cut my bra and parties in half.” “As he was looking at me standing there naked he smelled the crotch of my panties.” He said, “So, did your pussy get wet walking out along side of your manager?” “Does he hit on you in the store?”
I said, “No to both questions.” “He took off his clothes and made me sit on the bed.” “He stood in front of me and said, “Suck my dick you whore.” “I don’t know why he called me that but, I started sucking his dick.” “I always did what he wanted.” “He held my head and fucked my mouth hard telling me he was gonna give me what I was really wanting, a big hard dick in my pussy.”
“I have to admit, it turned me on when he would talk to me like that.” “He would fuck my mouth awhile then, he would pound my pussy.” “Then, all of a sudden he said to me during the throws of sex, would you fuck Julian in front of me if I ask you to?”
I said, “What, are you serious?” He said, “Yes I’m serious, I want you to fuck Julian and I wanna join you after he starts fucking your pussy.” “That’s what I want, will you do it for me?” I said, “What brought this on?” He said, “I don’t know but, I really want it so, will ya?” I said, “Does Julian know and what does he say?” He said, “He knows and he said he’d fuck you anytime I wanted.”
I said, “Momma, really?” “I can’t believe daddy would want that as jealous as he was.” Momma said, “That’s how I felt.” “But, he had been watching porn movies while I was working so, I think that’s what started it.” “So, did you agree?” Momma said, “I told him I had to think about it.” “But, in the end, I said yes, I’d fuck Julian for him.”
I was surprised when momma told me that because, she always seemed so reserved and proper.
Mom an I always had a close relationship and talked about things like this all the time. She told me one time she knew my step dad, David fantasized about fucking me. She said, “He talks to me about it while he’s fucking me.” “I told him I didn’t care he thought about fucking you.” “It turned him on an I enjoyed that it made his dick so hard.” I was shocked when she said it. Thank God she never found out I had fucked him for years.
I said “So, tell me about fucking Julian.” She said, “I’m sure you’re gonna think I’m a slut but, here goes.”
“Julian came over and we were drinking quite a bit.” “I know I was sure feeling very high.” “Your dad stood me in front of him and took my clothes off.” “Then they stripped.” “Your dad told Julian to start fucking my pussy.” “He was just gonna watch for a bit.” “Julian stuck his dick in me from behind.” “He’s pounding my pussy an your dad is jacking his dick off”
“Then, he gets up and puts it in my mouth and told me to suck him” “His dick is hard as a rock as he watches Julian’s dick go in an out of my pussy.” “Julian wasn’t as long as your dad but, he was thicker an it felt great.” “I was getting ready to cum and when I did your dad rammed his dick in my mouth and squirted his load down my throat.”
I said, “Good grief mom you’re making me horny, I’m gonna have to go home and fuck.” She laughed and said, “It still makes me horny when I think about what all we did” “A few strokes later, Julian cum and we all sat back and looked at one another.” “That kind of gave me a new husband, he calmed down with the jealousy and I actually thought he looked at every man as a possible person for a threesome.”
“I know we talked about the nights when Julian came over, and yes we had sex with him many more times.” I ask, “Did daddy ever fuck your ass?” She said, “Yes, they both did.” “I let them do what they wanted.” “Your dad was so happy”
“Have you ever told David about daddy and Julian?” She said, “I’ve wanted to but no, I haven’t.” I said, “I think he would like it, you outta tell him.” “You said he fantasies about me, so he’d probably be open to it.”
“It would probably turn him on.” She said, “Maybe”
At that point I wanted to tell her about how David had raped me and made me fuck him and like sex. I just couldn’t say the words. I was so afraid of it hurting her. I love knowing my mom loves sex the way I do and has had the experiences she’s had. I wonder what else momma did before she married daddy.
I know she wasn’t a virgin and I wonder if she was ever molested by a man or family member.
So, I just came out an ask her. “Mom, did anybody ever touch you or molest you when you were young?”
She looked at me and said after a long pause. “Yes, I had an uncle who raped me when I was 7.” I said, “Oh my gosh momma, I’m sorry.” She said, “Yeah, it was bad at the time but, he continued to fuck me an after awhile, I liked it.” “He brainwashed me into thinking I was his girlfriend.” “He acted like we were so special as a couple but, no one could know.” “He fucked me for about 3 years then, he joined the army and left.” “He was killed in Vietnam.”
“Did you become promiscuous due to the early sex encounter?” She said, “Yes, I did.” “Why did you ask me that?” I said, “I’ve read that girls who have early sexual experiences become promiscuous.” Momma said, “Well, I did for sure.” “I always gave in to men, thinking I had to.” “I was known as the easy girl to fuck.” “Really?” “Yeah, it hurt me when I heard that but, I always had boyfriends and men after me.” “Plus, I loved sex.” We laughed. I told her, “I love sex too.”
I was praying she doesn’t ask me the question I just ask her. But, she did. I was stuck. I wanted to confess but, was so afraid it would destroy our relationship and hers with David. She looked at me and said after I paused so long, “Well, I can tell you have been so, why can’t you just say it?” “I don’t know momma, I just can’t.” She said, “Come on sweetheart, look at what we’ve been talking about, very intimate issues.” “We’ve had no problem sharing before, what’s wrong now?”
I hung my head and she said, “Was it David?” I started crying, I couldn’t help myself.” She said, “Tell me darlin’, it’s okay, I’m okay only if you’re okay.” I looked at her and stopped crying. I said, “It was David but, I’m not angry or anything, I don’t blame him.”
She said, “You sound just like me, that’s how I felt with my uncle.” She said, “When did he do this to you?” I told her I was 11. She shook her head. She said, “That’s when I was taking care of my mother wasn’t it?”
I said, “Yeah.” She said, “I guess I was kinda ignoring him but, that doesn’t justify what he did to you.” I said, “Momma, please don’t tell him I told you and please don’t let this affect your marriage.” She said, “I’ll do whatever you want Kathy, you’re the victim here.”
“How long did he fuck you?” I said, “Until I went to college.” She said, “WHAT?” “Wow.” We laughed and I told her, “I told my husband and he was turned on by it.” I said, “Are you okay with this momma, please tell me you are?” She said, “I’m okay and I think I’m gonna play it up when he fantasies about fucking you.” “What do you mean?” She said, “I’m gonna get turned on and see what all he’ll tell me.”
“Then, eventually I’ll say, I think you’ve already fucked her.” I’ll tell him it’s okay if he has that I thought he had a long time ago.” I said, “Well if you do it like that, it’s okay with me.” “Just don’t come right out and tell him I told you.” She said, “I won’t.” We hugged each other and things seemed to be fine. Momma told me, “I’ve really enjoyed our talk today.” I said, “I did too.”
I went home and told my husband everything. He was glad and fucked me hard when I was telling him about my mom and dad. I couldn’t wait to hear what David tells mom. I’m so glad she knows. I don’t like keeping things from my mother.
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