IRL Confession: Went from a cheating bf to a wild spree that took a turn for the worse
Through most of my time in school I was in a relationship. Rarely ever single nor for long. I just didn’t really know how to handle not being someone, and the worst of it was arguably the longest relationship I had then. Even though he wasn’t the best for me, or we constantly got into fights, or he would find ways to belittle me, despite it all he remained what many called my high school sweetheart. This, ironically despite the fact we were constantly an on again off again relationship, but somehow even if I tried dating someone else, things always broke off and I ended right back with him. Worst of it was by the time we were well into high school, he was notorious cheat, he somehow had it in his mind no matter what he did I was always there to fall back on, and to be fair I was stupid enough to let that happen. I knew it then, he was a complete asshole taking me for a ride, wanting to have his cake and eat it. Eventually though, I had enough. The final straw was when he decided to cheat with his side piece then had the audacity to ask me out to our big school dance. I think that’s what finally snapped me out of it, what we had wasn’t love, it was shackles. He didn’t care about me, he just cared about his optics and his own needs.
I wasn’t exactly heart broken, but I wasn’t in a good state of mind either. I felt hell, why not, and started to stoop down to his level. Rather than breaking up, I decided to cheat on him, do what I wanted to do, with who I wanted. So definitely one way to go about that was to suddenly get a reputation at said school dance by sucking off some other guys throughout the night. At the time I thought I was being petty, doing what would make him jealous, not caring one bit the sort of infamy I was setting myself up for. In one night I blew three different guys, barely even knew them, didn’t even care. That, of course, sparked up a big fight once word got around, but I didn’t try to pretend, it was well over between us before we even went to that dance. Fact was, he didn’t even deserve the dignity to be told upfront it was over, and for once, I got to be the one to dump him.
After that I decided nah, I was done trying to always be in a relationship, I wanted to enjoy being single, focus on myself and what I wanted. Dumb me though thought that meant following along with what I started, so rather than much R&R with my friends, I started spiraling a bit into a wild streak. Like, it makes sense now, I always felt like I needed someone to be with, and if I wasn’t dating then what else was there? So stupid me, who just had a fresh reputation for being slut, started to go down that path.
I admit it, I practically became an easy score, any guy I was remotely interested was fair game. Started off slow, maybe just a freebie handjob or bj there, but it didn’t take it long before practically anyone could get into my pants. Nothing too worth writing about, but I’m pretty sure at one point I had like three fuckbuddies I cycled between give or flow. By the time summerbreak hit, it was harder to hook up with them, and worst yet, I needed a release.
Well, every summerbreak I go and pick up a summer job at the local Renaissance Festival. Nothing too fancy, just another store hand and occasionally cashier. However this time around it was so hard to not be tempted, I felt like I was primed to go at any moment. So when a much older guy, like in his 30s started flirting with me, I practically lost it. Like sure, I was only 15 but still, at the time none of that mattered. After some back and forth, he popped the question of whether I wanted to go back to their camper and get high, ofc I did!
So when I had the chance, I wrapped up my work and headed over to their camper. Met his other friends who were attending the Fair, two others about his age or so and another dude who looked to be maybe in his later 40s, definite dad bod. We shared some beers and passed around some blunts, honestly the first time I did both let alone drink. My mind already wasn’t in the right place, now it was even worse. And that’s when it started, the flirting. I thought like yeah, sure, all just fun and games but no. Turns out these weren’t just some random guys, but wannabe chasers to that Girls Gone Wild trend, going around filming girls for cash, and they figured the Renaissance Festival was perfect to prowl. It clearly didn’t matter to them I wasn’t 18, in fact they didn’t even ask, from what they made it out to be, anybody was fair game. So as worrying as that was, the temptation hit by the fact they were willing to put up cash for that.
It just, I don’t know, they just kept sweet talking me into it and I just came more to terms with it more and more. I don’t know if it was just because I was high or already horny, or the fact I was going to get some much needed cash, but I was getting more and more into the idea. One of them even pulled out his camera to show me a few of the other ones they got over the week, and while most of them seemed like the typical college or drunk types, a few were clearly just like me, and shockingly, I even recognized one of the pixie girls who had to have been like 12 or so. I was scared sure, but I felt so pressured to do it, so I agreed.
All I thought I was going to go through was suck someone off and at most take my top off. They were fine with that, and said I would get $50 for each of them, and anything with my face in would get blurred off.
Well, that’s how it started off, I gave some fake name for them and said I was 18 like it was a script, and engaged in some light play and teasing before taking off my top and bra before going down on one of the guys. I just zoned out what was actually happening and wanted it done with. Not only had I never done anything like this before, I never done so with an actual man. And sure enough they knew what they were doing too, because while I was off sucking another guy off, I could feel their hands on me elsewhere. I didn’t try to stop them when one of them pulled down my pants, part of me legit wanted this. Rather than just me fingering myself to feel their hands down there, but it wasn’t just hands. I was too out of it to tell him no, but I felt him behind me, pushing into me. It, it was more than I was use to. Heck everything to this point was more than I was use to. I felt twisted, like my consent was betrayed but also like an itch was finally being scratched, I tried to push him back, to push him off, but I eventually just gave up and let them go at it more.
So instead of something quick and easy, I ended up getting passed around and shared between. I felt like a pig on a spit, all while I knew someone was recording or taking pictures of it. I felt so done with it, I wanted it over and I wanted out of that camper. As I sobered up more, I spoke up more. I wasn’t into doing any anal or dp bs. One of them even tried to pressure me into doing a creampie for some extra cash, as if. When things finally wrapped up, and I was cleaning up, they let me know I was gonna get $600 for how good I did. By that point, I just wanted my dignity back. I didn’t feel it before, but this here made me feel like a slut and not one to be remotely proud of.
One of them had me exchange numbers with him, in case I was ever interested again, but I deleted it the moment I left. Sure enough after that, I felt my wild streak had ended. I lost any desire to go around like I was before, and sure enough at the start of the school year, alot of the boys found I wasn’t living up to that reputation anymore. Sure some boys still tried to chase it, but I was done with it, I wanted a break from that all together. It wasn’t until senior year I was finally back into the dating scene, though never
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