I just wanted to be a good mother. She is just to fast and it’s turning me into a different person.
Evie is a sweet child. She has always been very loving. My Husband used to always have her on his lap. He would get up early on his days off and watch cartoons while she sat on his lap.
I would get up a little after him and take my shower then start breakfast, while my husband took Evie into the shower and they washed up and got dressed. I had breakfast done by the time they were dressed. We all ate breakfast and went on with our day. I noticed through the years that she loved to sit on men’s laps. She never wanted to sit on my lap since she was 3. She is 10 years old now. And still likes to sit on men’s laps.
I have noticed over time that she likes to move around and wiggle around and bounce a little while on their laps. I have also noticed that when she is wearing a dress or skirt she likes to pick up the back of it as she sits down, so her little rump is on the men without her clothes between them.
I caught her a couple of times with no panties on. When she got off of her grandpa’s lap I noticed a wet spot, then again with her uncle. Now I make sure she is wearing panties, I might not like the ones she will wear, but I did put a stop to her leaving wet spots. At least for now.
She said she doesn’t like the panties I get her and she was refusing to wear them. I think she is too young to be wearing thongs, but I had to meet her in the middle and for some reason she loves to wear them. She thinks it’s funny that she can get grown men to do what she says and give her stuff.
I tried talking to her and explaining how wrong it was. Instead of taking my advice as a warning, she used it as a lesson on how she could look and act more sexy to men so they would like her more.
I almost made her stop dance lessons. I was thinking that maybe she was getting it there.
Then I remembered how young she started and it was way before she started the lessons.
My husband has been gone almost 2 years now. She might be acting more this way because she misses him. I miss him too because he was so good. He could really make me feel like I was in euphoria. Sometimes I think that I am overthinking it with Evie. She is a good girl.
She just likes to be affectionate, after all all of her little friends seem to behave and dress a lot like she does.
I started seeing a new man. He is very nice, but he wasn’t as good as my husband was. He is polite, wealthy and generous. He and Evie have taken to each other a lot. He always wants to buy us both things a lot. He has gotten us a lot of mother daughter matching clothes, like western wear with boots and hats, jackets, bikinis, nighties, shoes, jewelry, etc….
We go to plays and movies and he always sits between us. My favorite thing is to just spend a nice evening at home with maybe a good show on TV. I have to scurry Evie off to bed so I can get my turn in his lap. I felt a few wet spots when I got on his lap in my teddy. I have to wonder if it is Evie leaving a wet spot or is it pre-cum from Todd. He is always rock hard when I sit down on his lap.
I want to think it is because of me. I hate to think that Evie would try to do something with any grown man, especially Todd. But, what I really hate is that when I thought about it. I got turned on a little at first.
Then the more I thought about it the more turned on I got. Then I thought about getting her her own man. Not like one to be a boyfriend, just a gigolo or something like once a week to keep her satisfied. So she will leave Todd alone. But it doesn’t turn me on the same way that thinking about Todd doing it does, and then I could force Todd to do whatever I wanted. I know I shouldn’t have these thoughts. That’s why I am writing them down to see if this will get the thoughts out of my system.
I thought about setting up hidden cameras and leaving them alone for a couple of days to see what might happen. I thought about tying Todd up on the bed naked and then inviting Evie in as we both wear one of our matching sexy nighties. I Even thought about tying Evie up o the bed and Inviting Todd in the room after, but that could go very wrong if I guessed wrong. I also thought about just turning an evening watching TV into a MÉNAGE À TROIS. We could both teach Evie what she is so desperate to find out.
What kind of mother am I turning into?
What should I do?
How can I hate myself and be so turned on by the thought of this at the same time?
I am going to go get some camera’s this weekend…
I am becoming so wet, thinking about what they might do if left alone.
